Well, it's cycle. day. one. Ugh. I'm mad, sad, angry, and disappointed. I did learn a few things throughout this cycle though. I learned that if my temp stays up long past when it usually drops, I'm for sure not pregnant. I learned that if my period is 3 days late, I'm not pregnant. I learned that if I'm bloated enough to look pregnant for 6 days, I'm not pregnant. If I think I see a slight line, I'm definitely not pregnant. If I don't spot, I'm not pregnant. If I have a ton of symptoms that I can't make up, I'm not pregnant. I am not pregnant, again.
I was so sure that this was it. I tested one morning and fully expected to see a line. I knew I would, J was sure there would be a line and there wasn't, again. I took it hard and cried a lot. I'm really starting to doubt that we will be successful and it is breaking my heart.
I'm going to talk to my sister about things. She is a nurse and worked at a fertility clinic for years. I just want to know what my next steps will be when we hit the year mark. I don't know if getting this information will ease my mind or make me horribly scared. But I do know that from now on I am not going to get excited or even care about the most obvious symptoms and signs because there really is no point, they don't mean a thing. On to cycle 9.
No comments:
Post a Comment